Salame!

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Today I visited the La Brea tar pits which were tame at best. Sure watching a black bubble form over an extended period of time is one of my ideal pastimes, but I stumbled upon something far more interesting there. As I made my way from one uneventful tar pit to the other I heard a distinguished voice mumble “Portraits, three dollars” from a park bench. Where had I heard this voice? In the recesses of my mind, I saw a puppet. I saw a pair of glasses. I saw a blue tooth. Could it really be? Indeed, it be. I had crossed paths with the infamous David Liebe Hart. Upon confirmation, I confronted David to see why he was soliciting portraits. Shouldn’t he be sipping mojitos in a penthouse with Tim and Eric? Mr. Hart quickly gave me the scoop. Once the show ended he was unable to find any work and after his unemployment ran out, he had no choice but to take his talents to the streets and sell his CDs and drawings. Hunched over and clearly distraught, David showed all the signs of a defeated man. He went on to tell me that Tim and Eric won’t return his calls and Richard Dunn’s ex wife (who is now addicted to crystal meth) repeatedly makes passes at him. While I understand the fact that David is not Tim & Eric’s responsibility, it doesn’t make the situation and easier to swallow. I spent years of my youth idolizing this show and looking at every cast member as family. I had wild visions of Mr. Hart, James Quall, Richard Dunn, Tim, Eric, and Zach all sitting around a table sharing ghost stories over a freshly cooked bird. David confirmed this dream a reality, but told me that was all in the past. Sharing those silly antics are a thing of the past for them. at that moment Robert Frost’s words dawned on me: “Nothing gold can stay”.

I was taken aback. This was my first encounter with a person I perceived to be a celebrity undertaking tribulations far worse than myself. It was equal parts sobering and surreal.

I felt wrong asking for a photograph given the circumstances, so I just shook his hand and wished him the best. Ultimately, it’s David Liebe Hart and he’ll get himself back up on his feet. It’s just a difficult thing to see someone you idolized on television asking you for change years later.

There’s a Korendian woman out there somewhere searching from your embrace, David. Until that day, continue to inspire and keep the general populous informed about the importance of knowledge, and abstaining from rap music.

This universe is a crazy place. Salame.

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2 responses to “Salame!

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